Bliss
by catesy
Summary: Various one-shots for the pairing of Alice and Hatter. Most will be set after the mini. Chapter 15 up! Alice was his only reason to live and now she was gone.
1. Oyster

Oyster

Oyster. It was a word that set her apart from those in Wonderland. It was often spoken with fear or pity. More often than not spat with disgust. In wonderland she was a contaminant, something that never should have existed there in the first place.

To be branded with the name oyster, even more so to be branded with the "glow" as Hatter called it, had severely hurt. It was just like a racial slur, as demeaning as anything her world had come up with. This was the first time she had really felt how hard a simple word could sting.

Waking in the hospital and finding her glow gone had been a relief. She was just a normal person again. Just like everyone else. Nothing set her apart here, nothing marking her as other. No one here knows what the word oyster could mean and no one was going to use it to describe her.

When Hatter came for her she'd been so happy. She was also relieved to know that no one would ever make him out to be anything other than a normal, charming, handsome man. Her world knew nothing of Wonderland and there was nothing about him that would clue anyone in on the fact he came from another world. There was no light here to burn a brand in his skin and for that she was grateful.

Putting Wonderland and her oyster name behind her Alice began focusing on all the good things that had changed in her life. Hatter was definitely the best of those changes. He had left his life behind to start a new one here with her. She could only hope she was making him happy here and that he would never regret his decision.

He had been here a few weeks when it had happened. During a session of heated kisseing and whispered endearments he had called her that name. "My sweet little oyster." He whispered to her in between words like love and sweetheart as if there was nothing wrong with it. She froze underneath him and it took him a moment before he knew anything was wrong.

He pulled away to look down at her. "Whats that matter?"

She looked up at him, her hands still frozen at his back. "Why would you call me that?" She could see his confusion as he mentally went over what he had said to her. She pushed him off of her and got up so they were both sitting on the couch. "Why would you call me an oyster?"

Hatter sat there still looking lost. "Because...you..are?"

She moved from the couch to stand in front of him. "No I'm not" she said shaking her head. "Not here I'm not. I don't have to be branded with that name here. I don't have to be looked down on here and I'm not an oyster!"

Hatter stood up and moved towards her, his hand held out in front of him defensively. "Ok stop and just calm down. I didn't mean it to agitate ya like this. You know that. I was just trying to be cute thats all."

She shook her head again and backed away from him slightly. "Theres nothing cute about being an oyster Hatter. Oysters are something your people use. Something that they drain dry and then throw away. And the people who don't want to use them want nothing to do with them. They want to avoid my kind like we're some kind of plague."

Hatter closed the gap between them in a few short steps and reached out and grabbed her arm. She hadn't even realized that she had been clutching her arm to her chest, instinctively she had tried to hide her glow even if it was no longer there. Hatter forced her arm against his own chest grabbing her hand in his. "I don't think like that Alice. Oysters are different and amazing. They're all light and sound and feeling. You cant stop being an oyster any more than I can stop being a Wonderlander, and that I can assure hasn't always been seen as a good thing. You know if we're going to look at it that way then most of your people see Wonderlanders as monsters who come through the looking glass to steal them away in the middle of the night?"

Alice went quiet and thought about what he said. It was true and he was right but it still didn't change the fact that being an oyster held bad memories for her.

"Hey" he said as he reached up to cup his had to her face. "If it upsets ya this bad I wont say it anymore. Ok?"

She nodded and he tilted her chin up so he could catch her lips against his. He hadn't meant to hurt her and she knew that. They slipped slowly back into their previous activities. She knew that one day the word would lose its edge and no longer be hurtful to hear. Maybe, just maybe when that day came she would let him call her oyster. Because as much as she didn't like being called oyster, as long as she was being called _his _oyster than it might just be alright.

a/n

Ok so originally this was going to end with Alice becoming ok with Hatter using oyster as a pet name and I had intended it to be a fluffy piece. However as I wrote it Alice just didn't seem to like that idea and kept fighting to not be called oyster. I don't even think smooth talking Hatter could change her mind. Oh well. Hope to have another one-shot up soon.


	2. Never would have

Never would have

Alice wasn't doing anything important, just flipping through the mail and talking about her day at work. Hatter had been listening but at some point along the way she had lost him. He was sitting at the kitchen table, one hand holding his head up while he looked at her with a semi-blank expression.

Alice continued talking for a few more minuets, this time putting down the mail and watching him. After about the third "Umm hmm" she had reached her limit. She wasn't really mad, after all its not like her day had been that interesting. But since he had insisted on hearing about it the least he could do was pay attention while she told him.

"Hatter!" Alice shouted as she waved her hand before his eyes.

Hatter was startled and jumped a bit in his chair before quickly looking up at her like a dear caught in headlights. "Yes."

Alice tilted her head to the side and crossed her arms. "Yes what?"

Hatter smiled up at her thou his eyes were still uncertain. "Yes to...whatever it is you asked."

"I didn't ask a question." said Alice

"Oh."

She leaned in closer to him. "You weren't listening were you?"

He stood ready to defend himself and pointed at her. "I was when you started talking." He paused and thought for a moment. "But then my train of thought got derailed slightly." He said making a ziz-zag motion with his hand.

Alice opened her mouth to argue when he stopped her. "But, the derailing was only because I was contemplating how beautiful you are."

Alice shot him a very dry look that said she didn't believe him. "Yeah, all right, whatever you say. I have laundry to do." She scooted past him and walked towards the bedroom.

"Its true Alice." He argued as he followed her. "Thats what I was thinking about. Don't you believe me?"

"Nope."

"Well its true." He said as he sat on the bed. "I was watching you standing there and I thought that you are so very beautiful."

Alice turned towards him. "And how did that," she said mimicking his same zig-zag hand motions from earlier, "derail you?"

Hatter flopped back on the bed and folded his hands over his chest."It lead me to the thought that you, Alice, are nowhere near the same class of girls I used to date in Wonderland."

Alice leaned back against the dresser and thought quietly for a second. "I can't figure out if that's an insult or a compliment."

He sat up again and leaned forward on his knees. "A compliment I can assure you." He looked up at her gaging her reaction and making sure it was alright to continue. "See, the girls I saw before were just for fun. They were all body and no brain. Ya know, easy maintenance. Nothing I had to put too much time or effort into. Very convenient."

He stood up from the bed and moved to stand in front of her. "And then I had the thought, what if we hadn't met the way we did? What if I had seen you at some party or bar or shop somewhere. I never would have even said hello to you." He scooped up her hands and held them in his. "You're very pretty and I can tell just by looking at you you're cleaver. You tend to dress in a way that says you're not advertising yourself. In short, you're nothing I used to look for."

Alice smirked at him. "So I'm not your type? You wouldn't have even looked twice at me?"

"Oh no, I would have looked twice." He leaned back and eyed her up and down. "Probably more than that. Still I never would have tried to go after you."

He leaned in close and rested his forehead against hers. "Who would have thought Ratty would be a good matchmaker." He reached down and cupped her cheek. "I should have payed him more for you." He said before leaning down and kissing her.

Alice kissed him back before pulling away. Looking up and sighing at him,. "I suppose I'll never know if that's what you were really thinking or if you put that all together just now so I wouldn't be angry at you."

Hatter looked at her and smiled. "Sorry love, I wasn't listening, what did you say?"


	3. Birthday

Birthday

Hatter never gave birthdays a second thought before coming to live in the Oyster world. Wonderland simply didn't celebrate them. There was no point really, who cared that you were born? Everyone came into the world the same way, it was really nothing special.

So when a few weeks into his stay in Alice's world, she told him they would be going to a birthday party for her friend Jenny, Hatter had laughed. Of course Oysters would make a big deal out of nothing. Alice thought it was just as strange that Wonderland didn't have birthdays.

She had tried to argue with him on why a birthday was important. "Hatter, the whole point of birthdays is to show that person that you are happy they were born."

"No Alice, I've been here long enough to know that you oysters would celebrate the sun rising if it meant giving each other gifts and the opportunity to get liquored up." Finally she gave up and asked him to go with and play along just for her sake.

Of course if it was important to her he had no problem going. They had met with about fifteen other people for dinner and drinks. Afterwards Jenny's boyfriend had the waiter bring out a large cake with candles stuck in it. Another silly oyster custom of singing happy birthday and blowing out candles.

Alice explained to him latter that night that when you blew out the candles you are supposed to make a birthday wish.

When they had gone home that night Hatter told Alice exactly what he thought of birthdays. "It's brilliant love, whoever came up with this was a genius." Birthdays, he told her, were simply a wonderful way for businesses to turn a profit. He chalked it up to what he called the Hallmark scam.

Just another excuse to spend money.

Alice was just a bit too tipsy to fight with him. In the end she took the high road and informed him that he was just jealous he hadn't thought of it back in wonderland. This of course led to Hatter's favorite form of retaliation involving lots of kissing and very little clothing.

That had been the end of the argument. Alice had told him she didn't care if he thought birthdays were just one big scam. As long as he was willing to suffer through them with her she would be happy. In the months that followed they celebrated three other holidays and attended two more birthday parties.

He had stopped pointing out the flaws of each holiday, as it ended up being more to his favor to play along and make Alice happy.

One day after having dinner at her mothers, Carol brought out a small chocolate cake with a single candle. "Happy birthday honey!"

"Thanks mom" she said blowing out her candle.

Hatter watched as she plucked the candle from the cake licking the frosting from the bottom before cutting a slice of cake and passing it to him. He watched as Alice cut a two more slices. Carol told him that this cake was from Alice's favorite bakery. "It's a family tradition." she said. "Every year I drive across town just for this cake."

"I always look forward to it." said Alice as she took a large bite of her cake. Looking for all the world like it was the best food she'd ever had.

Hatter remained silent for most of the night while Alice and her mother talked amongst themselves. Why hadn't Alice told him it was her birthday? This was different than the other birthdays he had seen celebrated. There were no decorations, no cards, no singing, no gathering of friends forcing brightly wrapped gifts in her lap. It was just the three of them and Alice seemed very happy with her little chocolate cake. So why did he feel so bad?

That night he asked her why she hadn't told him about her birthday.

Alice just shrugged. "You don't like birthdays so why does it matter?"

"Because its your birthday!" He said looking down at her. "We should have had a big party for you. I could have at least gotten you a gift."

"Hatter." she said. "I'm not going to make you take part in the Hallmark scam. As much as I don't like to admit it, you were right. All that fuss is pretty meaningless. I had a much better time with just you and mom than I would have had at any party." She leaned up and kissed him. "Besides, that fact that you care means more than any gift you could have gotten me."

"But Alice..." He called after her as she made her way to the bedroom.

She turned around and smiled at him. "Hatter stop worrying about it. Its just a birthday, it's not important." She turned around and disappeared into the bedroom.

But it was important and suddenly he had a new appreciation for birthdays. She had been right all along. Birthdays were for celebrating the day of a person's birth, for showing that you were grateful for them being born. There was no one he was more grateful for than Alice.

Hatter went to the bedroom to find Alice already dressed in pajamas. She was sitting on the edge of the bed brushing her hair and putting it into a pony tail. He walked over to her and took the brush from her hands. He pushed her down into the bed and leaned forward over her. His lips met hers in a searing kiss he hoped expressed what he was feeling.

He broke away from her just long enough to look into her eyes. "Happy birthday Alice."


	4. Chasing hats

Chasing hats

Alice hurried down the street, weaving her way in and out of the crowd. This time the object she was chasing had been spotted from the window of a cafe. A brown porkpie hat. Her latte abandoned she had rushed out chasing after said hat and the man under it. As she got closer she was able to see just who she was chasing after and her feet slowly came to a stop.

The man looked about sixty with graying hair and dark skin. Definitely not Hatter. The rush of excitement that had taken her over moments before was now replaced with familiar disappointment.

It had been two weeks of this. Two weeks since she had fallen back through the Looking Glass. At first it was just mild curiosity. She would see a fedora and found herself going out of her way to see what the man wearing it looked like. None of them had been Hatter. As the days passed she found herself scanning the crowd looking for hats of any kind, anything she thought Hatter would wear. At one point she had given chase to a brown leather jacket through the mall, of course, with the same result as all the others.

It was all getting out of hand. The thought that Hatter would just show up in her world was ridiculous. The fact she was looking for him randomly in crowds was even more absurd. As she stood there in the street, people still passing around her, she knew this had to stop. She couldn't go chasing hats the rest of her life.

She turned around and began making her way home. There must be something wrong with her. Mentally, she must be broken. She had a good idea of what was spurring this on. She knew her father was gone now and there was no longer a need to look for him. She had put away maps and files and closed her accounts on people finder sites. Now she was filling the void left from losing her father by jumping head first into a search for Hatter.

No way. There was no way she was going to put herself through this again. She had given ten years of her life to the search for her father and she would be damned if she was going to spend the next ten looking for a man who didn't even exist in her world.

She was a few blocks from her apartment when she saw another possible Hatter. He was ahead of her walking in the same direction. This man wore a gray coat matched with a black fedora. The hight was right, the hair color correct, although it seemed to be a bit too well kept for Hatter's taste. Normally he would have been a perfect candidate for her to chase down.

But she didn't, she stopped and watched as he continued walking away from her and disappeared into the crowded street. If she didn't stop this would only escalate. She had to move on with her life. The best thing she could do was forget about Wonderland and everything that had happened there.

Her decision made Alice hurry home keeping her head down and resisting the urge to look at the people around her. She stopped at the small grocery store on the corner of her street and picked up a few things for dinner. Rushing the rest of the way home she was relieved when she finally stepped into the lobby of her building.

It was a small steep but she felt better already. With a little self control she would be able to put everything behind her and finally get back to normal.

Alice made her way up the stairs to her apartment and paused to pull the keys from her pocket. She was about to put the key into the lock when her Carol opened the door. "Alice" Her mother said smiling at her and taking the bags from her arms. "You have a visitor."

Alice walked in and looked towards the living room. There he stood ,wearing a gray coat and holding a black fedora, the man that she had chosen not to chase after. It had been him after all.

"Hatter!" She cried running towards him. She wrapped her arms around his neck and hugged him. She felt him return her hug, holding her just as tightly as she did him. "You have no idea how happy I am to see you."

His mouth was close to her ear and she heard him let out a heavy sigh. "Finally."


	5. Driven

Driven

Alice drove them out into the suburbs, about an hour from the city. There was little traffic here and would be perfect for what they had to do. She pulled over to the side of the road and took the key from the ignition before stepping out of the car.

Hatter got out as well and the two switched places. He slid into the driver's seat, adjusting it to fit his height and fiddling with the mirrors. He held his hand out, waiting for her to hand him the keys.

"Seatbelt."

"Oh, ok. Now, I noticed you only went fifty five. The speedometer goes up to one hundred and forty, so when do I get to go that fast?" He clicked the seatbelt into place and reached for the keys.

Before he could take them, she snatched them back. "Never. Never, ever!"

"Ok." He reached for the keys again, but she wouldn't hand them over.

"Not good enough, promise me."

He sighed. "I promise, I'll not go that fast with you in the car."

She shook her head. "Nope. Not good enough. Repeat after me, I will never go more than ten miles over the speed limit."

He huffed, rolled his eyes, and held his hands up in exasperation. "Fine, I will never go more than ten miles over the speed limit."

"And," she said, "I will always be careful and never be reckless."

That earned her another eye roll and a huff. "Alice..."

"Promise!"

"Fine, I will always be careful, and never be reckless. You know, I haven't even done anything wrong yet. It hurts that you wont give me the benefit of the doubt. I don't know why you're so skeptical of me."

"Preventive measures."

She handed him the keys and watched him carefully as he started up the car. He reached to turn on the radio but she smacked his hand away. "No distractions. Keep your eyes on the road."

"You really are sucking all the fun out of this, ya know." He shifted the car into drive and pulled off the shoulder.

"Ok, you're going to drive down this road until I tell you otherwise. There's a few twist, but you wont actually turn anywhere until I tell you."

"Yes ma'am." He smiled and looked at her, she met him with a frown and pointed back towards the road.

He drove down the road, doing well to drive down the center of his lane. He took the first twist a little to fast, he had to slowdown midway into it and did stray from his lane slightly. She didn't say anything, but did have a death grip on the hand rest. He slowed down before they came to the next twist and took that one just fine.

"Relax, will ya. And stop trying to press the brake on that side, you look silly pressing imaginary petals."

He took his right hand off the wheel and tried to take her hand. She pushed his hand away and back towards the steering wheel. "Both hands on the wheel, stop watching me and keep your eyes on the road."

They drove a few more miles before she told him to take his first turn. "Up here, make a right. Don't forget to straighten the wheel out as you make the turn."

"Alice, I know how to turn. I got plenty of practice yesterday when you had me drive in that parking lot."

He made the turn just fine and they continued on.

"Was your mom this nervous when she taught you to drive."

"I don't know, I guess so. I was too busy trying to drive to notice how she was reacting. Which brings me back to my point, stop watching me and keep your attention on the road."

"How did your first time driving go? Did ya do good?"

"I was fine going straight but I messed up on my first turn. Thats why I took you to the parking lot, so you could practice."

He nodded. "How did you mess up the turn?"

She sighed. "I forgot to straighten the wheel out, I jumped the curb and almost ran into a fire hydrant."

He laughed. "Really? That's kind of a big mistake, luv."

"I know, and you didn't make it. I'm proud of you, you're doing really well."

"Thanks, luv. That means a lot."

Alice was sincere when she said he was doing well. She even let him get on the expressway. The speed limit was seventy five but she didn't say anything when he set the cruse at eighty. They were heading home. There was at least an hour of highway driving before they were back in the city limits. Hatter wasn't ready for city driving yet so before they got that far they would switch again.

He thanked her when she turned the radio on. He was doing well enough that music wasn't going to distract him. They talked for awhile but sometime during the ride, she fell asleep.

"Alice?" Hatter gently shook her awake.

"Hmm?" She woke up and rubbed her eyes.

"We're home, luv."

She quickly shook off the last haze of sleep and looked around. She saw that they were, in fact, in the parking garage of their apartment building.

City driving was dangerous. The main roads had multiple lanes and there were people crossing the road everywhere. Driving in the city meant stop and go traffic and lots of swearing at other drivers. Yet, Hatter had gotten through it without even waking her up.

That fact, added to this being his first time ever really driving, made the whole thing amazing.

They got out of the car and she looked at him. "You were supposed to wake me up _before_ we got into the city."

"I know, but you were sleeping so peacefully, I didn't want to wake you."

She just shook her head and looped her arm through his. "Well, you must have done ok, we made it home in one piece."

The got into the elevator and headed up towards their apartment. "Of course I did. I promised I'd take care of you, didn't I?"

She leaned her head against his shoulder and laced her fingers with his. Of course he got them home safe, she never should have doubted him. She was sure he always would.


	6. Evicted!

Evicted!

Carol slipped into the elevator of her apartment building, shutting her eyes and resting her head against the back wall. It had been a long day and she just wanted to get home and relax. If she was lucky, Alice might already have dinner fixed for them.

Carol thought about Alice and the difference in her this last month. Ever since her accident at the warehouse and the addition of David Temple in her life, she'd changed quite a bit. It hadn't happened slowly either, it was like a switch had been flipped in her daughter's brain.

Once, Alice had been a goal orientated, serious, and untrusting young girl. One bump to the head later and she was laughing and smiling and acting like a teenager in love. Her daughter said that it was time to move on and put the past and her father behind her. The hours she once spent trolling the Internet and people finder websites were now spent on dates with David.

David was a drastic change, in both their lives. For so long it had been just the two of them. Alice only dated lightly in high school and had gone out with a small handful of young men in recent years. Fewer still ever made it into their home, and to put it frankly, none had lasted past that point. Alice wasn't difficult or ill-mannered in anyway, she simply had a problem letting men get close to her. Carol blamed herself for that. If she had handled things differently after Robert disappeared, maybe Alice wouldn't have had such a hard time trusting people.

David seemed to be the exception to the rule. Ever since he and Alice had met, or reunited as Alice put it, not a day had gone by that the young man hadn't been with her daughter. She'd been shocked when Alice had thrown herself, literally, at David, who Carol had assumed was a stranger to them both. They'd fed her a story about how they had dated before and split on friendly terms only to realize they still had feelings for each other.

It was a lie and she knew it. She'd tried several time to learn the truth, getting one or the other alone and grilling them about the facts of their prior relationship but nether had slipped up yet. In fact, there were a number of things she knew they were lying about but it seemed that whenever one came up with a lie, the other seamlessly followed it. They gave her no proof, but her motherly instincts told her to be suspicious.

She didn't mind David being around all the time. He was a polite and well-mannered young man and he treated Alice like she was a princess. Strangely, Alice seemed to have no problem with how fast their relationship was moving.

A week ago, Alice told her that David asked her to move in with him. Carol almost spit her coffee across the table. They hadn't even been dating a month and he already wanted to live together?

After Carol recovered from her shock, she questioned Alice. "What did he say when you told him no?"

Alice just took another bight of her lunch before answering. "I didn't tell him no, I just said I had to think about it."

Think about it? Really? Maybe Alice had hit her head harder than the doctors' thought. Her daughter had once dumped a boy for asking her to go out of state with him for a weekend, claiming it was too soon for that kind of thing. Another boyfriend had been cast aside for wanting to keep his things in the same locker at the dojo. Yet she was thinking about living with David? The whole thing made no sense.

As strange as the situation was, the two just seemed to fit together. Sometimes she found their conversations weird and their inside jokes even stranger. They made references to oysters a lot, and talked about tea and even more bizarrely, talked about emotions like they had flavor. David made the comment frequently that Alice's kisses tasted like bliss. Maybe it was just a British thing. That was where he said he was from right?

She exited the elevator and dug her keys from her pocket. Alice had the day off today which likely meant David did also. They'd been timing their days off from work lately. While Alice normally would have spent the day at his apartment, she had asked her to stay home so someone would be here to sign for a package.

She was sure to make plenty of noise unlocking the door, just in case the two were 'cuddling'. Alice was an adult and she wasn't about to tell her what she should and shouldn't do in her own home. She just didn't want to see or hear what the two of them did on their own time.

Normally Alice wouldn't even bring a boy home, let alone allow him spend the night. In fact, as far as she knew, that had never happened before. The first morning she'd woken up to find the two of them having breakfast was an absolute shock. Somehow, as she listened to the conversation they were having about what they were going to do that day, she got the feeling she was the only one who found the situation awkward.

She'd asked Alice about it the next day. Her daughter just shrugged.

"Sorry mom. If you don't want him to spend the night I can always just sleep at Hatter's."

She'd told Alice she didn't mind as long as she was comfortable, it was her apartment too after all. 'Hatter', already wanted her to move in with him and she didn't want to give Alice any reason to feel that moving out was her only option.

That was another thing, Alice rarely called David by his name, preferring instead to call him by his nickname. It was just another inside joke that she was on the outside of.

Carol opened the door and hung her keys on the little teapot hook. David's coat hung on the coat rack next to Alice's purse. The two were obviously home despite the quiet of the apartment. Immediately, Carol knew something was up. She gave the living room a quick scan and found nothing out of place.

The package she'd been waiting for sat on the couch. Her new couch, she reminded herself. The old one had fallen victim to what Alice and David insisted was an accident. He'd apologized, saying that he'd sat on the arm of the couch and that was why it had broken off. David was a slight man and she didn't believe for a moment he weighed enough to break the arm himself. But then again, it was an old sofa so maybe there was _some_ truth to that story. Regardless, he'd offered to buy her a brand new couch and she hadn't argued.

However, the next week when the coffee table suffered a similar accident, she no longer bought his excuse of clumsiness. Hindsight being what it was, she now regretted pressing Alice so hard for the truth. An embarrassed Alice explained to her that both items had been broken as a result of their 'cuddling'. Alice had explained that they'd gotten frisky on the couch and sometime during that, she'd lost her balance and fallen backwards, breaking the coffee table. She hadn't asked any questions after that, having heard enough of her daughters sex life.

The following week when the shower door somehow got knocked off its hinge and also needed fixing, she'd kidded David about how clumsy he was and that she knew he'd fix it for her.

She looked down the hall at Alice's closed door. Hopefully they were both just napping. She'd had a very rough day at work and just wanted some peace and quite. A nice cold glass of wine sounded wonderful. She'd slip into something comfy and put her new DVD in and just unwind the rest of the night. She took her package and went to the kitchen to get get a knife to open the box, and stopped dead in her tracks.

It looked like a flour bomb had exploded and taken the rest of the food in the fridge with it. Mixing bowls and spoons were scattered on the counter. Eggs sat out next to a smashed stick of butter, one lonely little egg left unharmed in the carton. A half gallon of milk was left tipped over on the kitchen table, milk still dripping slowly from the plastic container. Her mixer, her _brand new_ mixer that she hadn't even used herself yet, was propped open, dough caked on is shiny mettle beaters.

Carol backed out of the room slowly, fearing if she made any sudden movements the mess before her would somehow come to life and attack her. She took great pride in keeping her kitchen clean and tidy. This was the last straw, broken furniture aside she was not going to tolerate a mess of this magnitude.

The sound of her heals echoed off the walls as she marched down the hall toward her daughter's room. The giggling that leaked out from under the door was quickly silenced as she pounder her fist against the smooth wood.

"Get dressed and get out here... NOW!"

She turned on her heals, not waiting for a reply. She stormed back into the kitchen and pulled two chairs next to each other and stood waiting in front of them. She hadn't had to use this tactic since Alice was six and gave the neighbor's purebred thousand dollar show dog a hair cut.

She heard the shuffle of feat approaching and turned to see Alice and David walk into the kitchen. If she hadn't been so angry, she might have laughed out loud. They stood before her, their clothing rumpled and covered in flour. David's hair was more messy than usual and he was missing the hat she was so used to seeing him in. The green button-up shirt he wore was missing a few buttons and a few dried pieces of dough clung to his pants. Alice looked no better. The tank top she had on was ripped at one shoulder and aside from the flour, there were smudges of chocolate on her neck and chest.

Alice was staring at her fingers, picking at her nails nervously. David had his hands tucked in his pockets, his gaze fixed on the floor.

"Sit." she ordered. The pair shuffled past her and each took a seat before her.

Carol crossed her arms and stared down at the childish adults before her. "Well, I'm waiting. Explain this to me."

David was the first to answer. "We were making cookies."

He didn't say anything more, as if that simple statement would answer her question. "Ok, and how did everything end up like... this?" she said, waving her hand at the mess before her.

David looked thoughtful for a moment before speaking. "They um... the food, it rebelled."

That did make her laugh. The ridiculousness of that statement was only furthered by Alice.

"The milk and the eggs ganged up on us. We were out numbered." She spoke the lie in a completely deadpan, serious way.

Carol pinched the bridge of her noes. This was it, she couldn't take it anymore. These two were going to drive her crazy and she only knew one way to save her sanity.

She looked down at her daughter who was staring up at her like a scolded child waiting for her punishment. "I'm going to tell you two what is going to happen now. Then you both are going to get up and clean this kitchen spotless, understand?"

They both nodded and she continued. "The two of you have been romping around this apartment for four weeks now, acting like horny rabbits. You've broken my furniture and disturbed my sleep. While I'm happy for you both that you've stumbled into..." she gestured between them. "Whatever this is. I'm going to draw the line at the destruction of my kitchen."

The pair was silent and she glared down at David. "You want her to come live with you?"

David nodded. "Yes ma'am."

"Good," She said, nodding in approval. "Because Alice is going to need some place to stay when I kick her out."

"Mom?" Alice said, her brows furrowed in confusion.

"It's for your own good, and mine. You're obviously in love with this man and you've never done anything the easy way. If you need a swift kick in the right direction then I'll be happy to give it to you."

"Really?" David was looking up at her like a kid on Christmas.

Carol reached out and plucked a bit of egg shell out of his hair. "Yes David, you can have her."

"Mom, I'm a person, not a thing. You can't just give me away."

Carol bent down and kissed Alice on the forehead. "Sweetie, when the baby bird grows up and starts shitting all over the nest, it's time for the mama bird too kick her out and let her fly."

David looked at Alice casting her a dimpled grin. Alice just huffed and rolled her eyes. "Don't look so smug."

David stood and crooked a finger in Alice's direction. "Come along little birdy. We have to clean our mess before we can start packing your things."

"And do it quietly. Suddenly, I have a splitting headache." Carol turned and walked out, hoping that somehow, they would actually do what they were supposed to. She went to the bathroom to get some aspirin and she could still hear them arguing.

"Well I hope you're happy, this is all your fault."

"I am happy. I've gotten everything I wanted today. Well, aside from fresh baked cookies."

"Yep, and you're never going to get them either. God, I can't believe you got me kicked out of my own home."

"I know a bloke you can stay with. Real nice guy, hansom too. Of course, he does expect his usual cut, if you know what I mean."

She heard the sound of the spray nozzle being pulled from the sink.

"Damn, Alice, that water is hot!"

"I know. You're a dirty boy, you need to be cleaned."

Carol quickly swallowed the aspirin and retreated to the safety of her room. She'd be lucky if she had a kitchen left tomorrow.


	7. Phobias part one

Phobias part one

"Alice, there's another one!" Hatter pointed at one of the many boxes that surrounded them.

She looked over to see a small spider desperately trying to crawl away back into the shadows of the storage room. Hatter frantically grabbed for his weapon of choice, a rolled-up newspaper. He quickly swatted the little spider, hitting the box a few more times than was needed.

She sighed and continued searching through boxes. "I can't believe you're afraid of spiders."

"I can't believe you're not! Honestly, those monsters are disgusting."

She opened a box labeled 'keep' hoping it was what she was looking for. Unfortunately it was full of old pots and pans. She had no idea why her mother kept so much junk.

"Are you sure they don't have spiders in Wonderland?"

Hatter cautiously made his way toward her, his paper at the ready in case any more 'monsters' showed up. "Absolutely not! I'd remember something that ugly. Only your world would have something that vile."

"Right, because Jabberwocky are way less vile than poor, helpless spiders."

"Jabberwock" he corrected. "At least you know when a Jabberwock is coming. Spiders are small and sneak up on ya. Ya don't know they're there until they've already sank their fangs into ya and pumped you full of venom."

She rolled her eyes. "God Hatter, there's not a spider poisonous enough to hurt you in a thousand miles. It's ridiculous how sacred you are."

He pulled a box away from the wall looking it over carefully before sitting on it. "Ya know, I had expected you to be a bit more sympathetic. The fear of heights is just as ridiculous as arachnophobia."

"Oh it is not. My fear is legitimate, you can die from falling."

"You can die from a spider bite too! I saw it on the animal channel."

She had given up looking on the left side of the room and turned her attention to the right. "Yeah maybe in the rain forest spiders can kill you. We don't live anywhere near spiders that dangerous." She paused looking thoughtful for a moment before continuing. "Well, I guess that's not completely true, considering what happened last week."

She watched from the corner of her eye as he leaned forward, worry flashing across his face. "What happened last week?"

She crossed her arms and stared down at him. "I don't want to worry you, I'm sure its nothing."

"Alice, come on, you have to tell me!"

"Well, sometimes the zoo gets spiders from the rain forest or other parts of the world. You know, the big kind." She held up her hand spreading her fingers as far apart as she could. "About this big."

She had his complete attention now and he was watching her with eyes as big as saucers. "In the zoo they keep them in cages right?"

"Well, yeah but..."

"But what?"

She turned away from him and pulled out another box. "Last week, a Redback spider got loose."

"A Redback spider?" She could hear the quiver in his voice. "Is that a large spider?"

"Oh no, they are not very big but they can kill you if they bite you. But we don't have to worry, they like dark, unused places. They wouldn't be anywhere there are a lot of people."

She heard him stand up and move closer toward her. "Alice, this storage room is pretty dark."

She laughed. "Don't be silly, what are the chances of that _one_ spider hiding in _our_ storage unit?"

"With our luck, pretty good. Come on, forget the decorations, let's get out of here."

"Hatter I..." she screamed. "Something bit me!"

"Alice!" He jumped forward and grabbed her hand and pulled her away from the box. "Where did it bite you?"

She stilled and smiled up at him. "Got ya."

He dropped her hand and backed away from her. "That's not funny!"

She was laughing so hard she was crying. "Yes it was. You should have seen your face!"

"That was cruel and mean-spirited and for heaven's sake, stop laughing." He left the storage room and she thought he was gone. Then suddenly he was back. "This isn't over! You just wait!"

He was gone again and she could hear him stomping up the stairs heading back to mom's apartment. Maybe it was a little mean but it was funny. Besides, short of actually pushing her off a building how was he going to scare her?

She thought about that a moment before locking the storage room and going after him. She needed to apologize. There were plenty of ways he could scare her, the least of which dealt with her fear of heights.


	8. Phobias part two

Phobias part two

Hatter leaned against the hood of the car and stared at the amusement park. It looked like fun and he knew he would enjoy the day. Alice, however, seemed to have another opinion. She was still siting in the car, but he hadn't really expected anything but stubborn resistance from her.

It had been a month since her little joke about the spider and he knew she thought he'd forgotten about it. This morning he'd told her they were going out and that she needed to dress casually but didn't tell her where they were going. If she had known, he was fairly certain she never would have left the apartment.

He'd worked hard coming up with this. It had taken him a long while to decide how best to scare the daylights out of her. Last week he'd seen an ad for something called a roller coaster. A quick Google search later he knew exactly how to get her back.

Looking at the skyline of the park he could see exactly what he'd come here for darting up above the other buildings. They had to park quite a ways away from the entrance but he could make out the little cars that carried people along the twists and turns of the track.

He glanced over his shoulder at Alice who was still sitting in the car. He'd shut the engine off and rolled the windows up before getting out of the car. It had been ten minutes now and it had to be uncomfortably hot in there.

He knocked lightly on the widow. "Come on, ya can't sit in there all day."

"Nope, I'm good."

He opened the door. "Alice, the sooner we go in there the sooner we can have fun, yeah?"

She let out a very unladylike like snort. "Fun my ass. You're just punishing me."

"Maybe I am but you deserve it. Now get out!"

She grabbed the armrest clearly bracing herself for a fight. "You'll have to drag me from this car kicking and screaming."

He leaned down so his face was close to hers. "Now look, I've come this far I'm not going to back out now. You can make a scene if ya want but keep in mind that we've never tested whether or not my records are legit here. Should someone call the cops I could end up in trouble and I don't really think you want me kicked out of the country now do you?"

She closed her eyes and pursed her lips but didn't say anything. He reached out and touched her cheek. "I know you love me. Now get out of the car."

He stood and allowed her space to exit the car. After a moment she followed him. He knew she was switching tactics when she placed her hands on his chest and leaned into him.

"Hatter please, let's just go home." She wrapped her arms around his neck and whispered in his ear. "We can spend the whole day in bed. I know you can think of better ways to punish me than this."

She was clever, he had to give her that. Tempting as her offer was he knew her well enough to know that he could definitely have his cake and eat it too. "Mmm we can do that later but right now you have a date with a roller coaster."

He held her tight and moved her away from the car, kicking the door shut before she had a chance to retreat back inside. The sound of the alarm let her know she was now locked out and he prepared himself for what he was sure she was going to do next.

He lead her off into the park. She dragged her feet behind him but he kept a firm grip on her hand. He heard her whimper and he turned around. She had worked a few tears out and was looking up at him with a completely pitiful expression.

"Cut the tears luv, I'm not buying it."

Her expression quickly turned to anger and she yanked her hand away from him. In an extremely childlike manor she stomped her foot in anger. "Fine!" she huffed and quickly walked in front of him. "Let's just get this over with so we can go home."

They headed right to the Cyclone and took their place at the back of the line. He figured if they got this out of the way first he might be able to convince her to walk around the park with him. He tried several times to start a conversation but she just ignored him. Finally he gave up and just looked over the railing as the line slowly moved forward.

He could see there were smaller rides around the park and little booths everywhere. There was another large roller coaster and a large round thing that seemed to slowly move in a circle. He asked her what that was but again got no reply. It didn't really matter, he'd never be able to get her on another ride anyway.

They reached the top platform and were only a few people away from their turn at the ride. He was surprised when she grabbed his hand and held it tightly. He could tell she was legitimately distraught this time and not faking it like she had in the parking lot. He couldn't help but feel guilty even though this was exactly what he brought her here for.

He leaned down and whispered on her ear. "It's alright Kettle, this will be over soon and we'll be back on the ground."

They moved forward a space and she shut her eyes tight and shook her head. "No, it's not alright. We're too high. This ride is old and unsafe. We're going to die."

Honest tears slid down her cheeks and he really did feel awful. "We're not going to die. Look," he pointed at the cars filled with people. "There's an old lady on there. And look at all those kids, if they can do this I know you can."

They moved forward one more space and it was their turn next. She leaned into him and hid her face against his shoulder. She mumbled something incoherent and he just wrapped his arm around her shoulder.

When it was their turn he pulled her along into the car. They sat down and the attendant shut the lap bar down across their legs. He gave the bar a quick tug showing Alice that it wasn't going to just come up on it's own. It didn't seem to comfort her any and she whimpered as the car lurched forward and slowly began it's climb up the track. She had a death grip on his hand and her other gripped the lap bar just as tightly.

"Alice just relax. It's not that bad. In fact, I don't think we're that high up at all."

The clicking of the chain stopped and he guessed they had reached the top of the track. For a long second the car stilled and then suddenly they were falling. Everyone on the ride was screaming and he didn't know if he could hear Alice or not. The speed of the car increased as they plummeted down the hill and whipped around a set of turns before taking another drop. The track turned in on itself and they spiraled up only to be dropped again.

The track took one more dip before they slowed and come to a stop. His stomach settled and his heart was pounding. That was amazing and he wished they could stay and ride it again. One look at Alice and he knew that wasn't going to happen. She was bent over the lap bar, her eyes shut tight. He guessed she hadn't looked up the whole ride.

"You ok?"

She nodded and he helper her stand when the attendant came by to let them out. His legs were shaking and Alice didn't seem to be doing any better. They walked down the wooden ramp in silence and he led her to a bench once they reached the ground.

He slowly rubbed her back and waited patiently for her to collect herself. After a few moments she recovered enough to speak.

"Is that it?" she asked, her voice a little shaky. "Are you done torturing me?"

He pulled her close and was pleasantly surprised when she hugged him back. "Yes, luv, I think we're even now."

"Thank god, for a minute there I though you were going to make me ride the Ferris Wheel."

He looked up towards the large circle ride. "Is that what that thing is called? I actually did want to go on that one."

"Hatter."

"I'm just kidding, luv." He stood and helped her up. "Let's go play some of those games and I'll win you something nice, yeah?"

The rest of the day was fun for both of them. He won her three stuffed animals in the carnival games and she'd been willing to ride the small rides with him. Fast and spinning seemed to be all right with her as long as they didn't get too far off the ground.

At the end of the day they were sitting on the beach and watching the sun set, oblivious to the other couples around them.

"Well, aside from the roller coaster, did you enjoy the day?"

She smiled and nodded. "Yeah I had fun. I guess I did over-react a little about the roller coaster. I mean, it's not like we were going to fall off or anything."

"Yeah." he agreed. "I acted a little silly about the whole spider thing. They're more afraid of me than I am them. After all I'm the one smashing them."

"Hatter, the fearless spider smasher!" They both laughed at that.

"Truce?" she said, holding her hand out in a peace offering.

"Truce." he agreed. He took her hand and kissed it before capturing her mouth with his.


	9. Reflection

Reflection

Alice stared at her reflection in the full length mirror. Even though she hadn't worn it in months the blue pinafore dress still fit like a glove. The raspberry tights that had survived madmen, Jabberwock, and falling off a Flamingo, still clung tightly to her legs. Her favorite pair of boots completed the whole thing.

She hadn't worn this outfit since Wonderland. Wearing it brought back so many memories, some good, some bad. Which was exactly why she'd tucked the dress away in the back of her closet. It had hung there undisturbed until she had moved in with Hatter a few days ago. She'd only looked at it a second before packing it away with the rest of her clothes, not giving the dress too much thought.

Then Hatter found it.

She'd been unpacking books when he came out of the of bedroom holding the dress. He just stood there holding it out like she should know what he wanted.

"_What are you doing with that?" she questioned._

"_I was trying to fit all of our clothes into the closet. Which, by the way, I'm beginning to think is an impossible task. I found this tucked all the way in the back." He looked the dress over. "Poor thing was smashed up next to that ugly brown dress of yours."_

"_Yeah, well, I don't think I'm going to wear it very often."_

_He handed the dress to her. "Put it on."_

"_What?"_

"_Go put it on. The tights too."_

"_Why? Are we going out?"_

_He sat down on the couch. "No, I don't think so. I just want to see you in it."_

_She looked down at the dress in her hands. She almost argued with him. It was late and she didn't really want to play dress up. She looked at him and he shot her a cheeky little grin. He made a little turn around motion with his finger and shooed her into the bedroom._

_She went to the bedroom without protest. If this was what he wanted then who was she to tell him no. _

She looked at herself one more time in the mirror before leaving the bedroom. She didn't know why she felt nervous to let him see her like this but she did. He wanted to see her look the way she did in Wonderland. She wasn't sure she'd look the same. She'd been Alice of Legend then, the outfit might not look the same on just plain Alice. Maybe seeing her dressed like this in the real world wouldn't live up to his expectations.

She walked slowly down the hall and hesitated a second before finally stepping into his line of vision. He just stared at her, his expression blank as his eyes wandered over her form. He stood up from the couch and slowly circled her a few times. Every now and then he'd reach out and pull on the fabric of her dress or run his fingers along her arms. He stopped in front of her and cupped her cheek. His lips met hers in a sweet, slow kiss.

He broke away and rested his forehead against hers. "You're perfect."

She smiled. "Thank you."

He grabbed her shoulders and turned her around, guiding her back down the hallway. "Now, you just need a finishing touch."

She glanced back at him. "What's that?"

He stopped them in front of the bathroom door. "Go jump in the shower."

"What?" She looked up at him confused. "You just had me get dressed, now you want me take a shower?"

"No, I just want you wet."

She'd figured this whole thing had to do with sex, but she thought he'd just wanted her in the dress so he could take it off. She had no idea how far he wanted to take this little fantasy of his but if he wanted her in a very wet dress than she could handle that. She went to do as he asked and he called out to her before leaving. "Cold water luv, I'd like ya shivering a little."

She turned on the cold watter and let it run for a moment. She was about to jump into the shower when she remembered to take her boots off. She loved Hatter but she wasn't about to subject her footwear to another soaking if she could help it. Shoes safely removed, she hopped in the tub and let the cold water wash over her.

Once she was completely soaked she shut the water off and let the excess drip away down the drain. She silently cursed him as she stepped shivering from the shower. She was definitely going to came up with a way to get him back for this. Maybe she'd give him the same treatment and have him take a cold shower in a leather jacket and porkpie hat; see how much he wanted to have sex after taking a very cold shower.

She dripped her way into the bedroom. He was seated on the edge of the bed anxiously waiting for her. A dimpled smile spread across his face and she almost thought she saw him bounce slightly in excitement.

She did a slow spin, letting him inspect her. "You don't think this is pushing the whole fantasy thing a bit far?"

"Absolutely not. Details are very important and you," he said nodding in approval. "Are just about accurate." His brows furrowed as his gaze fell on her bare feet. "What happened to your boots?"

"I'm not getting them wet again. Just pretend I lost them somewhere."

He stood up. "How did you break out of the Scarab?"

This was it, he wanted to replay their fist meeting. She couldn't help but feel nervous. She didn't even remember exactly what she'd said the first time. Apparently, Hatter was better at remembering these things.

"I used my hair pin and..."

"Fell."

She held her hands out at her sides. "As you can see, I'm drenched."

He nodded and looked up and down the line of her body. It was the same look he'd given her so long ago. However this time she knew what he was thinking and she couldn't help the blush that rose to her cheeks.

"Where am I?"

"Oh," he said pointing up at nothing in-particular. "Wonderland."

"That's a story in a kids' book."

He took a few steps closer. "Does this look like a kids' story to you?"

"No." she whispered as he closed the distance between them. She couldn't remember if he talked next or if she did. He circled round behind her. "Hatter, I've never done this kind of thing before, I don't think I'm any good at it."

He rested his hands on her shoulders. "You're doing fine, just relax."

"But I don't remember my lines."

He leaned in close to her ear, chuckling softly. "Its called improv, luv. Just make it up as you go along. Besides, some details are better left out."

His mouth was right next to her ear and his whispers fell hot on her skin. She swallowed down the lump that had formed in her throat and tried to sound confident when she spoke. "I've heard you can help me get home."

"Maybe. I do have some connections. Won't be easy though, could take a while to get things in order." He ran the tips of his fingers over her bare arms and she couldn't help the shiver that ran through her. "But I'll take care of you till then. I suppose the first thing I should do is get you warm."

Warm? He was doing a good job of that just by talking. "I have a little money but I understand you don't use that here."

He circled around her again and stopped in front of her this time. "Pieces of paper? Pointless."

"Then why would you help me?"

"Do I need a reason to help a beautiful little Oyster in a very wet dress?"

She smiled up at him. "I remember that one, that's not the way that line goes."

He circled behind her and struck her ass with a resounding smack. "I told you it's improv, now stop breaking character."

She turned around quickly and pretended to be insulted. "Don't put your hands on me. I don't know what you think but I'm not that kind of girl."

"Oh. And how else do you expect to pay me?" He grabbed her hands, turning them over and inspecting them. "I don't see anything of value on your person. That makes your body the only thing I want. I'd call it a fair trade."

She stepped backwards and raised her chin in the air, trying to remain emotionless."You want me to have sex with you just so you'll get me home?"

"Why not? It's not like you have a boyfriend or anything. Do you?"

"No." she answered. Well, at least now she knew what detail he wanted to leave out."I suppose it could be worse, I could have been forced into sex with the guy that brought me here. At least you're good looking."

"Now isn't that a disgusting thought." he smirked and took a step toward her. "I wouldn't want his filthy hands to soil something that's mine." He cupped her chin and raised her face to meet his.

It was strange to talk like this. None of this would have ever happened in real life. But this was his fantasy after all, if he wanted to play the sexy Tea seller helping the little lost Oyster, then that's what she would give him.

"I really do want to go home. I'm willing to do anything."

"I don't know what I like better, feisty resistance or willing compliance."

He didn't give her a chance to respond before he pushed her ruffly backwards onto the bed. She wanted to argue that she was going to get the bed wet but the protest died on her lips as his hands roamed over her legs.

"Let's get you out of these wet clothes first. Pity I don't have anything for you to wear while they dry."

She shifted so she was closer to the edge of the bed. "You don't have a spare coat? I could always wear that until my clothes dry."

He shook his head slowly. "Nope," he said popping the P at the end of the word. "I don't keep extras here in my office."

His hands slid up and under her dress. He hooked his fingers under the waist of her tights and started tugging them down. He stopped when she didn't lift her hips to help him. "What's the matter? You don't trust me?"

"I don't really think trusting you is what's best for me in this situation." Despite what she said, she did lift her hips off the bed and he finished removing her tights.

"Now Alice, if we're to have a business relationship, you really need to trust that I know what's best for you." He knelt on the bed, her legs straddling his waist.

She sat up on the bed and wrapped her arms around his neck. "I suppose if I scratch your back, you'll scratch mine?"

She ground herself slowly against him which earned her a low moan. He unzipped the back of her dress before pushing her back down, capturing her lips as he went. He broke the kiss and pushed a few wet strands of hair away from her face. "Definitely. Lots of scratching."


	10. River Sickness

_A/n _

_No real point to this story, it's just pure fluff. Enjoy!_

River Sickness

The first three days out of Wonderland had been great. After a flurry of lies fed to her mother and a quick getaway, she spent the first day showing Hatter around the city and teaching him how things worked here. The second day, she'd shown up early at his apartment and after breakfast, they'd spent the afternoon shopping for furniture, clothes, and other things.

The third day started out similar to the ones before. He picked her up and took her out to lunch before they returned to his apartment to set up his new things. By the afternoon, she started feeling extremely worn out. She chalked it up to being so busy lately combined with everything she'd gone through in Wonderland.

Hatter noticed her change in energy and insisted they spend the rest of the night relaxing and watching movies. She fell asleep on the couch, cuddled against his chest while they watched Casablanca. Hatter woke her up hours later when he noticed how warm she was.

The fever came first, accompanied by extreme weakness. She could hardly sit up on the couch and knew standing and walking were way beyond her at this point. She felt terrible, just her luck to get sick when she was trying to enjoy spending time with Hatter.

He was fussing over her, asking when exactly she started feeling ill and pressing her to describe how she felt. There wasn't any good reason why he should be worried, it was just a cold or at worst, the flu. She was more worried about getting him sick, after all he really didn't have any immunity to germs here.

She was confused when he lifted her shirt and ran his hand over her stomach. "What are you doing?"

"You have river sickness."

She looked down at her stomach and found a huge rash covered in lots of little bumps. "Oh my god!" She tried to get off the couch but he just pushed her back down. "What's river sickness?"

"It's something you get from swimming in the lake of Wonderland. You probably caught it the time you fell out of the Scarab. It's a children's disease so it never even crossed my mind you could get it."

"Is it bad?"

"No, you can only catch it once. Most mothers toss their kids in the lake when they are five or six then they room them with a bunch of other kids who need to catch it. It's easier to get river sickness when you're young. It'll be a little rougher on ya because of your age, but it's noting serious."

He lifted her shirt again and looked at her rash. "Did you have this this morning?"

"No. I think I would have noticed that. I felt fine until a few hours ago."

He nodded. "That's good. Once you get the rash, you're highly contagious. Hopefully your mum won't come down with it."

Her mom, she hadn't even thought about that. "How long will this last?"

"Three or four more days. Ya can't risk getting your mum sick so, you're stuck here with me. Sorry." He was smiling and looked anything but sorry.

She really didn't know why, being stuck with a sick Oyster for three days couldn't have been high on his list of things to do. "What are we going to tell mom? She'll never believe me staying here for days without coming home."

He thought for a moment before raising a finger signaling for her to wait. Funny considering she wasn't going anywhere. "You, are going to call Carol," he said, fishing around in her purse and retrieving her cell phone. He handed it to her and smiled broadly down at her. "Tell her your wonderful, handsome, boyfriend is taking you on a three day holiday."

She took the phone but didn't open it. "She'll never believe that. I would never go away for a weekend with someone I've only know a week and she knows that."

"Yeah, and she also thinks I'm your long lost love who's moved halfway round the world to be with you. It's a good cover story and it'll buy me some points with her."

Alice sighed and called her mom, playing along with Hatter's lie and trying to sound like she didn't feel like she'd just been run over by a train. To her surprise, Carol had actually believed the whole thing and even encouraged her to be gone longer. "David's such a sweet boy, Alice. Enjoy yourself."

She flipped the phone shut and closed her eyes. Her head was pounding and there was a horrible ringing in her ears she really wished would stop. "Hatter?"

She didn't hear him and cracked her eyes open. He wasn't in the living room anymore. She managed to sit up but the action made the room spin. She took a few deep breaths to steady herself before she stood and stumbled into the kitchen. He wasn't there but he had put a kettle of tea on the stove.

"Hatter?" she called out again, louder this time.

She hadn't heard him come down the hall and startled a bit as his arms circled around her waist. "You shouldn't be up, luv. I was just making up the bed for you." He held her tightly and tried to lead her to the bedroom. When she slumped under her own weight, he bent down and scooped her up, carrying her the rest of the way.

She whimpered softly as he laid her down on the bed. "Good thing they delivered the bed today, yeah?" He fussed with the pillows under her head. "I'll have you know, this is not how I envisioned getting you into bed. You were much more lively in my fantasies."

She managed a few soft chuckles but it sounded more like crying than laughing. It felt like her whole body was bruised and beaten and she was so cold. "How long will I feel like this?"

He brushed her sweat-dampened hair off her face. "You might be feeling better in the morning. The first twelve hours are the worst. Sleep will help, you need to rest."

Her eyes closed while he spoke to her, it was just too hard to keep them open. He covered her with a light sheet but it wasn't enough. She reached for the comforter but he just pushed it further away.

"I know you feel cold but you're running a fervor. Do they have medicine here for that?"

She didn't even have enough strength to nod her head. "The pharmacy on the corner. I just need some aspirin or something."

That was the last thing she remembered saying before she slipped into unconsciousness. She was vaguely aware of Hatter waking her to take a few pills at some point. Mostly she remembered tossing and turning. Her body kept switching between being way to hot and uncomfortably cold. She was kicking her blanket off one moment and tugging it tight around her the next.

Her fever finally broke sometime around three in the morning. She was drenched in sweat and still dressed fully from the day before. She sat up, testing her strength to see if she could make it to the bathroom. Now that the fever was gone her body seemed to be leaning more towards normal.

Hatter was on the bed next to her, fully dressed and laying on top of the blanket, somehow still asleep. How in the world he managed to sleep at all with all her tossing and turning she had no idea. She slowly swung her legs over the side of the bed, trying not to wake him as she made her way to the bathroom.

She splashed cool watter over her face before she looked at her reflection in the mirror. Dark circles lined her eyes and her skin was horribly pale. Her hair was slick with sweat and clung to her forehead and neck. Her lips were dry and cracked. In short, she looked like crap.

"Alice? You ok?" Hatter stood in the doorway, hair and clothes rumpled from sleep

She ducked her head, suddenly self-conscious. "Yeah, I'm feeling a little better."

He closed in on her and ran his fingers along her neck. "That rash is spreading." He fingered her wet shirt. "I need to get you a change of clothes. Sit down, I'll be right back."

She slumped down on the edge of the tub and buried her head in her hands. Now that she was feeling a little better, she was mortified that Hatter was seeing her like this. No matter how comfortable she felt around him, it didn't change the fact that they'd only known each other for six days. She didn't like anyone seeing her when she was sick, let alone a new boyfriend.

He came back with a light cotton t-shirt and boxers. "Can you dress yourself? I'll be happy to help if ya need it?" He was smiling and flirting with her like nothing was wrong.

"No, I think I can handle it."

"I'll be right outside if ya need me." He pressed a kiss to her temple and left the room, closing the door behind him.

The muscles in her arms were stiff and achy and it hurt to raise them above her head as she pulled her shirt off. Thankfully her bra latched in the front so that was easy enough to shrug off. The rash spread out across her chest and was a darker shade of red now. This really sucked. It reminded her of when she was thirteen and caught the chicken pox. She couldn't decide what was worse, the constant itching of chicken pox or the energy draining weakness that came with river sickness.

She ran a wet washcloth over her chest, stomach, and arms, before slipping into Hatter's shirt. Standing for as long as she had drained her. Even though she felt much better for having washed and changed, she was completely exhausted again.

She stepped out of the bathroom and saw Hatter leaning against the wall waiting for her. His head snapped up and he looked her over from head to toe. She still couldn't believe he found anything attractive about her in the state she was in. He quickly wrapped his arm around her waist and led her back into the bedroom.

He kept her siting up while he rearranged her pillows. "Maybe now that you've changed, you'll sleep more peaceful." Apparently her tossing hadn't gone unnoticed.

"Hatter, I'm really sorry to put you through this."

"Don't be," he said, sitting next to her. "It makes me feel useful."

She laid down on her side. "Why wouldn't you feel useful?"

He laid down next to her and rubbed her back. "Because I don't know anything about this world of yours. I've done nothing but follow you around like a dog since I've come here. I rely on you far too much."

The rhythm of his hand moving up and down her back was lulling her into sleep and she fought to stay awake. "I don't mind. I wasn't any better when we were in Wonderland. At least you're not risking your life every five seconds and making me save you."

He chuckled and moved closer to her so he could rub the muscles in her shoulder and back. "Well, that's the difference between us. You were running about trying to save the world. I'm just trying to furnish an apartment and make a home for myself. I'm more sensible, thats all."

He pulled her close and softly kissed her neck. "Your life may not be in danger over here, and I may not have the hang of everything just yet, but I'll still make sure you're ok."

She rolled over and he laid down on his back so she could rest her head on his chest. "I'm a lucky girl." The steady beating of his heart filled her ears and she drifted off into a peaceful sleep.


	11. Time

Time

"Alice, how many days are in a year?"

"Three hundred and sixty five." She'd become so used to questions like that, that she didn't even look up from the book she was reading. Hatter was always asking questions about her world and how things worked. The novelty of which had warn off months ago. She'd long ago stopped asking why he needed to know something and instead just gave answers.

"Thats bloody insane!" He joined her on the couch, calendar in hand. "Why would you make a year so long?"

She marked her page and closed her book. Clearly this was not a one word answer type of question. "Because of how long it takes the earth to rotate around the sun."

He didn't look satisfied by that answer and was still flipping through the pages of the calendar.

"Why? How many days is a year in Wonderland?"

"A hundred and eighty nine." He closed the calendar and tossed it on the table. "I guess that makes sense. I was wondering why Jack cut my age in half."

She thought about that for a moment. "So before you came to my world, you were fifty six years old?"

He nodded. "It did feel a little weird at first, saying I was Twenty eight. It made me feel like a teenager again."

"So... Charlie's not really one hundred and fifty, he's only what... seventy?"

"Seventy five." he quickly answered. He was really fast with numbers. "Ya know I've been thinking about this for awhile now. It's a real relief to know that we age the same."

"You were afraid we wouldn't?" He'd never mentioned this before. It was a pretty important fact to just ignore.

"I knew Oysters only live to be seventy or eighty. The average life span in Wonderland is one hundred and seventy. I was afraid I was going to out live you." He looked incredibly sad at the thought of outliving her and she scooted closer to him and wrapped her arms around his neck.

"You should have said something sooner, it's all about perception Hatter." He hugged her back and pressed a kiss to her temple. "Most women out live men anyway. I'm the one who has to worry about outliving you."

"What about when I'm old and gray and off my rocker like Charlie? Are you going to be willing to take care of me then?"

He was smiling now, and she laughed with him. She could only imagine living with an eighty year old Hatter. "No, I wont have too. That's what people have kids for. When you go crazy, I'll just dump you off on them and I'll move to Florida."

"Umm, that's another issue. What if me being from Wonderland complicates things?"

She swung her leg over his and straddled his lap. "There's no way for me to answer that. We'll just have to work on it and prove it one way or another." She undid his pants and slipped her hand inside. "Either way, It'll be fun finding out."

_A/n_

_I know that the fic's where they grow old and he out lives her and wonderfully written and often incredibly sad, but I just can't stand the idea of that happening. So, I fixed it! It makes me feel better!_

_Late tonight or at least by mid afternoon tomorrow, I have a surprise that I'll be posting in the M section so keep an eye out or check my profile!_


	12. Gone

_A/n_

_This has been sitting around on my computer for awhile, so I decided to post it. Hope you like it!_

Gone

It was Christmas and Hatter had gone all out on the decoration which meant one overloaded electrical outlet and a blown fuse. She was at work and he didn't know how to fix it. She came home and found him sitting out in the hall reading a book.

"I didn't know what to do?" he said in his defense. "The lights only go out in Wonderland when there's a storm. I had no idea you could break electricity."

She showed him the fuse box and restored light to their apartment. "Next time don't plug so much into one spot, ok?"

Hatter went back to stringing lights around the window. "Yes ma'am."

This wasn't the first time he broke something and didn't know how to fix it and it probably wouldn't be the last. It was at this point she teased him. "You know, you were so put together in Wonderland. You knew everything there. You move to the other side of the Looking Glass, and suddenly you're breaking things left and right."

"Well, if that's what you think, then I suppose I could always go back to Wonderland. At least there I'm not as clumsy, yeah."

She laughed, he smiled, that was the end of it.

Except it wasn't. That simple little banter had been enough to plant the seed of doubt in her mind. Ever since Hatter had shown up, she never once considered he would leave her. He'd spent so much time protecting her and fighting to be by her side; he given up so much, and taken so many chances, just so they could be together. The idea of Hatter just walking away from her had never even crossed her mind. Odd since that had always been her first thought when getting involved with anyone, romantically or otherwise.

'I could always go back to Wonderland.' That wasn't what he meant. She'd teased him and he teased right back. It was light hearted and he didn't mean it that way. The rest of the night she tried to convince herself that was true. But she couldn't stop thinking about it.

What if Hatter left her? She was so completely in love with him and it made her heart hurt thinking that it could ever happen. Honestly, what tied him to her world? He had no family here, most if not all of his friends were hers as well. He had a good job here but that didn't compare to running his own business like he had in Wonderland. What was there to stop him for slipping back through the Looking Glass and never returning?

Hatter asked her why she was being so quiet. She just shrugged and said she had a bad day. He told her to lighten up. "How can you not be cheerful? Look at the tree, Alice. It's brilliant, isn't it?"

She had to agree, it was beautiful. He done a great job decorating and she admitted as much. She and her mother hadn't really celebrated Christmas since dad left. It just hadn't felt right without him. When she told Hatter that they didn't really 'do Christmas', he couldn't believe it. He said there was finally a decent holiday and there was no way they weren't going to celebrate it.

So they dug up all the old decorations from storage and she'd let Hatter have at it. They had an extremely expensive but very real tree, covered in a mix of old family ornaments and new ones, and what had to be ten strings of lights. Every window in the apartment had lights, except for the bedroom. He'd argued that the lights would make the room romantic but she assured him there would be _no_ romance if even one light made its way into their room.

He'd even bought them each a stocking, which he'd hung on the wall behind the TV. Of all the things she would never have expected from her fast talking, ex-con boyfriend, was that he'd written their names in glitter paint at the top of each.

Even though the tree had only been up for a day, he already had gifts under it. Five perfectly wrapped gifts, two for her mother and three for her.

As much as she appreciated what a great job he had done she still couldn't shake the somber mood she'd gotten herself into. Hatter tried to make her feel better. He teased her about the gifts he'd bought her and how she would have to wait two weeks to find out exactly what they were. She smiled and tried to laugh but it wasn't working. All she could think about was how he could leave at any moment if he wanted too. She would miss his smile, his arms around her waist, his laughter and his voice, that accent she loved so much...

By the time they went to bed he'd stopped trying to cheer her up and started trying to get her to tell him what was wrong.

"Alice, is it something I did? Because if it is, I can't fix it unless you tell me."

"No, it's not you, it's me and it's embarrassing so just drop it, ok?" She was embarrassed. This was a childish fear and irrational. She didn't want to hurt him by voicing it, he didn't deserve that. He was happy and she was happy and there was no reason at all that she should ever doubt his loyalty and commitment to her. Even knowing all that, the fear of him leaving her was still there.

"I know what it is." he said, rolling onto his side and facing her. "It's Christmas isn't it? The whole thing about not wanting to celebrate because of your dad. It's made you sad, hasn't it?"

She didn't say anything and he must have taken that as a sign he was right. "He'd want you to be happy, luv. He wouldn't want you to give up the good things in life just because he's not here to share them with you."

"Hatter, that's not it." She had to tell him. If she didn't, it would just eat away at her. "It's what you said earlier."

He sighed and rolled over onto his back. "I knew it was something I did. What did I say? I didn't mean to upset you."

"I know you didn't, and it's not your fault. I'm just..." She didn't know how to put it in a way he would understand. She didn't want him to think she didn't trust him because she did, completely. "It was what you said, about going back to Wonderland."

"Alice, I didn't..."

"I know," she said, silencing him. "You're not going to leave me. I guess old habits die hard. I never even though about you going back to Wonderland until you mentioned it. I'm being silly, I just..." she trailed off, not knowing what she could really say to validate her feelings.

He pulled her close, wrapping her in a warm embrace. "I'm not going to leave you, not ever. I swear." He moved so he could look in her eyes. "It's just you and I now, you know that. Team Hatter, remember."

She laughed. "What happened to team Alice?"

"No, I've told you thats a girly name. Team Hatter sounds much better." He rolled on top of her. "If you think for one second I'd ever leave you then you and I are severely out of practice on our teamwork."

The next morning at breakfast, he handed her one of the gifts from under the tree.

"What's this?" she asked, taking the small box.

"Well, I was going to let you open this one early anyway. After last night, I figured I'd let you open it now."

She unwrapped the gift and opened the little white candy-cane covered box. It was an ornament, a little teacup with the words 'Our first Christmas' written on it. Two little mice sat in the teacup, hugging each other. It was the sweetest thing anyone had ever given her and she couldn't stop the few tears that welled up in her eyes.

She launched her self at him and hugged him as tight as she could. "It's perfect."

He held her tight and rested his cheek against her hair. "I thought we could get one every year, you know like a tradition." He took the ornament from her and flipped it over. "See, I already wrote the date on this one."

"Can I hang it on the tree?"

"Sure, " He motioned for her to go do just that. She picked a branch and hung the little teacup. It was the first Christmas ornament she'd hung since her dad left and she stopped celebrating the holiday. It spun slowly on the branch before stilling. It was a perfect example of their life together, surrounded by her old ornaments and the new Hatter had bought.

She leaned against him, resting her head on his shoulder. "I love you."

He pulled her close and pressed a kiss into her hair. "I love you too."


	13. Pizza

_A/n_

_Just a little one-shot about how Hatter found out about pizza and why it's important._

Pizza

Hatter and Alice fled from the the Great Library. He still couldn't believe Dodo had shot him. He knew he'd pissed the old bird off from time to time over the years, but he'd never expected him to _actually _shoot.

He needed to get Alice back to the Tea House so he could think up a new plan. He hadn't intended to keep her this long. Normally he would have dumped her off somewhere, not wanting to stay involved with something so dangerous. The penalty for meddling in the Queen's operations was death. Helping a runaway Oyster named Alice would definitely fall under the meddling category.

If she hadn't saved his life back there he probably would have let her run off on her own without a second thought. But she had saved him and he did owe her his life. If there was one thing he couldn't stand, it was being in debt to someone. This little Oyster might get him killed but he'd be damned if he wasn't going to repay his debt.

He led her through the twists and turns of the city with practiced ease. She stuck close to him, pressing against his side whenever she caught sight of the drop off.

They'd argued about what to do next. She insisted on trying to rescue, what was her boyfriend's name again? Jake, no Jack. He couldn't understand why she didn't just leave him. She was a pretty thing despite her big mouth and impossible stubborn streak, she'd have no problems finding another man to take his place.

The ledge they were on narrowed and she started to freeze up again. If he could get her thinking about Jack then maybe he could keep her mind off how high she was.

"That Jack guy must really fancy you, yeah? Even if he didn't know that ring was the stone of Wonderland, he must have know it was valuable. It's a pricey courting token."

"Courting token?"

Not the road he was hoping to go down, but it would work. If he could get her talking about the differences between her world and his, he could keep her mind off what was going on around her. "Yeah a courting token. When a man wants to gain a woman's affection, he gives her a token in exchange for her time."

"Her time? You mean he buys a date with her?"

"No he buys time with her. Most women won't even talk to you unless you give them a decent courting token. The value of the gift determines how much time a woman spends with you. You talk and try to get her to like you and if she does, then the two of you start courting. The more gifts you give her, the more time she spends with you" He looked back to make sure she was still close behind him.

"What kinds of gifts are you talking about?"

He thought back to his past courtships. Most women could be bought with Tea but he didn't think she would appreciate knowing that. Instead he tried to think of gifts he'd given before Tea came on the market.

"Food and clothing are good if the girl is below or at the same status level as you. Jewelery is a sure bet if she's above you." He glanced back only to be met with Alice's hard stare. God, did nothing make this woman happy? " I knew a girl once who loved music so I'd give her a music box every time I wanted to see her."

"Well that's not how it works in _my_ world." She said it in that 'my world makes so much sense, what the hell is wrong with you people' sort of way.

"Oh, I suppose you Oysters have a better system?"

"We have a _normal_ system. If you like someone, you ask them out on a date. You don't have to give gifts every time you want to see each other. We sure as hell don't _buy_ each other."

"And what do you people do on a _date_?" The word itself was an odd term for courting. Why couldn't Oysters just speak proper English?

"You go out to a movie or dinner. Sometimes it's as simple as having coffee together or pizza."

He knew what movies were and what coffee was, but he'd never heard of pizza. "What's Pizza?"

"It's a food. It's baked dough with tomato sauce and cheese. It's usually topped with meat and vegetables. It's really good."

Oysters were a strange group of people. "Ya know, for all the emotions you people can feel, you sure are a boring lot."

"Excuse me?"

"It seems like all you people do is sit around and eat."

"No, you just start with food because it's something everyone has in common. Once you get to know someone, and you like them and want to keep seeing them, a date can be lots of other things."

The conversation they had that day had long since been pushed to the back of his mind. Between running from the Suits and trying to rescue Alice, the subject of courting became irrelevant. It wasn't until much later that he even remembered what they'd talked about.

_'We could do pizza.'_

_'And lots of other things.'_

He sat in his ruined office, spinning idly in his chair, replaying their last conversation over and over in his mind. _His_ velvet purple coat was draped over his arms.

_'You know, you could always visit my world.'_

What the hell was she thinking? He couldn't visit her world, Jack was closing the Looking Glass as soon as all the Oysters were sent back. Even if there was time to go see her, what would be the point?

_'You want me to stay?'_

Hell no, of course not. She didn't belong in Wonderland any more then he belonged in her world. Besides, that hug she shared with the King and the subsequently pathetic awkward hug she'd given him, had proved who held her affections. He wasn't about to cross worlds just so she could reject him.

_'I've had enough of Wonderland for a lifetime.'_

Once the mirror was closed, she'd be unable to return. Not that it was much of a concern, she didn't want to come back to Wonderland anyway. There was noting but bad memories for her here.

There was the slam of his office door and a loud clanking of armor which could only signal the arrival of the White Knight. He was wondering if mad old Charlie was ever going to show up again. It was oddly comforting that he'd gained something out of this whole mess. A mad friend was better than no friends at all.

He spun his chair around to face the knight."Hello Charlie, would you like a cup of tea?"

Charlie stopped at the edge of the grass carpet, standing in about the same place as Alice had the first time they met. "What are you still doing here?"

He was puzzled by that question. "Well, this is still my shop. At least it will be unless the Hearts decide to confiscate all the Tea Houses."

"No, why have you not gone after Alice of Legend?"

He huffed and spun his chair away from the knight. "If this is all you've come to talk about you can save it. I'd like to put our whole little adventure behind me."

"I suppose that is why you are sitting alone in this run down building, clutching Alice of Legend's coat?"

Run down building? Charlie lived in a shack in the forest, he was the last person who should be making comments on someone else's living conditions. "I'm not clutching the coat, I just... haven't put it away yet."

"I may be an old man, but my hearing is sharp as anyone's. Alice of Legend invited you to come visit her land. Why have you not done so?"

He was getting aggravated now. If this was all Charlie had to say, he was wasting his time. "It's over Charlie, done. She doesn't want me going after her, she was just being polite. Everything's as it should be, the Queen is gone, the Oysters are gone, and Alice has gone home."

"Yes, and here you sit, pouting like a child who can not have his way." Charlie stalked across the room to stand before him. "I could see the connection between you and JustAlice from our first fated meeting in the woods. It is destined to be, you are her champion, why are you not at her side?"

"Charlie, she came here looking for her boyfriend. She's taken, she and I aren't destined to be anything."

Charlie straightened before him, head held high as he cast a downward glare at him. "His Majesty asked for her hand in marriage, she rejected him. She said she wanted something else."

"She wants something else?" Jack had offered her the throne, she could have ruled all of Wonderland. What more could she want?

_'We could do pizza.'_

_'and lots of other things.'_

For the first time since Alice had been pushed back through the mirror, hope swelled in his chest. He had been so nervous and anxious during that last meeting, he hardly even realized what he was saying. He asked her out to pizza, he asked her on a date. "She said yes to pizza with me. Charlie, do you know what that means?"

"No, I haven't a clue what pizza is."

Hatter didn't even hear Charlie. He jumped out of the chair, still clutching the purple coat."She said she wanted lots of other things. That's what you do after you already like someone!"

He grabbed Charlie's shoulders. "She doesn't want Jack, she _wants_ lots of other things!"

Hatter continued rambling and hardly noticed that Charlie was looking more and more confused. "I need to go see Jack. You're right, I need to go after her."

Charlie shook his head as Hatter ran off. "That man is mad as a box of frogs."


	14. Perfect

Perfect

Alice thought Hatter was good at just about everything. He'd taken to her world like a fish to water and every new thing she introduced him to, he picked up on quickly. The list of things Hatter had never done before, but seemed proficient at, was never-ending.

Within one week of coming here, he already knew his way around the city better then she did. She'd taken him dancing, which he said was completely different here than what they did in Wonderland, and after the first few dances he was moving like a pro. They'd gone out to the bar with friends and after watching one game of pool, just one, he was able to run the table. He just did everything so damn well.

He was a better cook then her, a better dresser, hell, he was even a better fighter. She'd studied Judo since she was sixteen, it had taken her years to earn her black belt. One night, after he'd watched her teach class and all the students had left, they'd playfully sparred with each other. Well, it started out as playful, it got more serious when she'd been unable to get the upper hand on him. Every move she made he countered. When he flipped her, she'd had it.

"How in the hell did you do that?" she said, still laying on the ground.

He chuckled and held out his hand to help her up. "I watched you, luv, I payed attention. You didn't think I was just drooling in the corner imagining what color knickers you had on, did you?"

Actually, that was what she thought he was doing. She took his offered hand and let him pull her to her feet. "It took me months to master that move, you couldn't have possibly learned it in an hour and a half."

He shrugged his shoulders. "What can I say, I'm fast learner."

Yeah, he was a fast learner all right. They'd gone out bowling with some of her friends, another game he said he'd never played before. After his first few awkward throws, he got a strike almost every time. She on the other hand, was lucky if her score broke one hundred.

He seemed to enjoy the game and all and all they'd had a lot of fun. At some point during the night, he'd made a bet with her. Whoever won the next three games of bowling, got to do whatever they wanted in bed that night. She accepted the bet even though she knew she couldn't win. She figured why the hell not, sex was just one more thing Hatter was incredibly good at. It was a win-win situation.

She, of course lost, and the minute they got back to their apartment, he pounced on her. They left a trail of clothing from the front door to the bedroom. He pulled her shirt off and unhooked her bra with what she was sure was one finger. As he pushed her to the bed and kissed her neck and chest, the last thing on her mind should have been how easily he removed her bra and how that was just one more thing he was excellent at. She just couldn't help it, how could he be so perfect?

"Hatter, is there anything you're not good at?"

He popped his head off her chest and looked down at her. "What?"

Immediately, she regretted asking that question. There was no reason she should push her own insecurities on him. "Never mind." she said, pushing his head back down to her chest.

He pushed her hand away from him and stayed where he was. "No, what do you mean, is there anything I'm _not_ good at?"

"It just... it seems like everything you do, you're perfect at it."

"Thats not true, I'm bad at a lot of things."

She let out a snorting laugh. "You learned an extremely complicated throw just by watching me, you play pool better than any pool shark I've ever seen, you know more about the history of my world then I do and you've only been here a few months, you unhook my bra with one finger. Since you've been here I haven't seen you do anything wrong."

"I don't think you're looking hard enough." He paused, thinking over her words. "So you're upset because I'm _not_ a screw-up?"

"I know, it's stupid." She rubbed her palms into her eyes. "There's just so many things I'm bad at, it's amazing how perfect you are."

He laughed and pressed his cheek to her chest, his stubble scratching lightly against her skin. "I'm far from perfect luv, I just cover up my flaws better than others." He kissed her skin before he folded his hands over her chest and rested his chin on them. "In fact, I'll show you what I'm worst at if you promise not to tell anyone."

"Ok, I promise." Honestly, it was probably no big deal. What could Mr. perfect be bad at?

"Are you sure? I've been told it borders on torture."

"Hatter, whatever it is, I'm sure it's not that bad. Come on, lay it on me."

"All right, but don't say I didn't warn you." He sat up, still straddling her legs, and cleared his throat. "Close your eyes and I'll kiss ya, tomorrow I'll miss ya, remember I'll always be true."

Her hand flew to her mouth and she tried not to laugh. He was singing and it was _awful_. Hatter was completely tone deaf and his voice cracked whenever he hit a high note.

"Ok, stop, that's enough. My god you're a bad singer."

He smiled down at her. "See, I told you. Why do you think I never sing when we all go out to croaky."

She burst into laughter. "It's ka-ra-o-ke, croak is the nose a frog makes."

"Makes no difference, I'm still bad at it." He reached down and gripped her wrists, pinning them to the bed. "Now lest see, what else can I sing to you."

"No, no more please."

"Oh, I know." he said before singing again. "I give her all my love, thats all I do, and if you saw my love, you'd love her too. I love her. She gives me ev'rything, and tenderly, the kiss my lover brings, she brings to me, and I love her"

She giggled and he bent down and kissed her softly. When he pulled away, she sang the next few lines of the song. "A love like ours, could never die, as long as I have you near me."

"You, my Alice, have the voice of an angel." He leaned down and nuzzled his noes against her ear. "You do lots of things well, but there's one in particular I'm fond of, and I do believe you lost our bet."

A/n

This was inspired by vanilla212 and her prompt at New_Wonderland about what Hatter would be bad at. Both songs are Beatles songs, for some reason, I think both he and Alice would really like the Beatles.


	15. Apocalypse

_Apocalypse_

Hatter ran up the stairwell of his apartment building. Large, gaping holes broke the smooth surface of the walls. The florescent lights flickered, more often off than on. From far below he could hear the moaning and breathing of the undead.

The shuffling of lifeless limbs echoed in the narrow stairwell. They were coming after him, attracted by the bleeding gash on his left leg. He couldn't even remember how he'd been wounded but he knew hiding was impossible now that they've caught his scent.

His injuries didn't matter to him as he hurried up to his floor. All he wanted to do was find Alice and get her away from here. If she wasn't in their apartment then he didn't know what he was going to do. He pulled out his cell phone again and tried calling her. He must have lost more blood then he thought because he was having a hard time dialing her phone. The numbers kept blurring and he kept hitting the wrong buttons on the phone.

Finally, after what seemed like forever, he reached his floor. Quickly closing the stairwell door, he snapped the lock in place. It would stop them for a while but not long. The hallway was wrecked. It looked like there had been a fire here. Paint peeled off the walls and water dripped from the sprinkler system. He ran down the hall towards his apartment, his feet splashing in the shallow puddles that covered the floor.

As he neared his doorway, his heart sank. His door was open and the room beyond was dark. Tentatively, he pushed the door all the way open and made his way inside. Everything here was trashed and in the center of it all, was Alice. He was at her side in a instant, his hands griping her cold skin. He pulled her into his lap and cradled her to him. Blood covered her blue dress and pale skin. He kissed her forehead and cried into her hair.

It was too late, he'd failed her. He could hear the moaning and pounding of the undead as they tried to get through the stairwell door, but he didn't care. There was no point trying to run or escape. Alice was his only reason to live and now she was gone.

Then, amazingly, her arm wrapped around his chest. Hope swelled in him for a brief moment as he thought she might be alive. He pulled back to look at her. Her clear blue eyes were now completely black and her lips were pulled back over her teeth in a twisted snarl.

Shocked, he pushed away from her and shuffled backwards. "Alice?"

She didn't respond. She pulled herself up on her hands and knees, her head hung low and hair hanging down in stringy tendrils around her face. His Alice was gone. She'd been turned and was now nothing more than another monster.

Alice let out a low growl before she lunged at him. He rolled to the side, narrowly escaping her teeth and nails. But he was injured and she was so much faster than him. He no sooner got to his feet then she was on his back, slamming him to the ground. She bit his neck tearing at his flesh and digging her nails into his skin. The pain was unbearable and by reflex, he fought to knock her off his back.

"Hatter! Hatter!"

Hatter sat up in bed, a cold sweet beaded on his face and chest. His heart was still beating furiously in his chest and his breath came in short, quick pants. He looked over at Alice who was sitting up in bed next to him. Her blue eyes were clear and her hair rumpled from sleep. Apart from the worried look on her face, she was fine. Alive and fine. He breathed a sigh of relief and fell back onto his pillow.

"Hatter, what the hell? You almost pushed me out of bed."

He pushed his fingers through his hair. "Zombies. They were everywhere."

Alice sighed in disgust. "See, I told you not to watch that movie. But did you listen?"

Hatter ignored her ranting and continued to describe his dream. "You were dead. Then you turned into a zombie and tried to eat me." His hand brushed over his neck. "Did you actually bite me?"

"No, not really, I just nibbled a little." she said as she pulled the covers tighter around herself. "You were moaning. I _thought_ you were having a good dream, and I wanted to get in on it."

Normally that would have made him smile, however he was still too terrified by his dream to find humor in any of this. "Believe me, you didn't want in on that. All you did was make it worse."

Alice settled back down into her pillow. "Hey, it's not my fault you have a delicate psyche. I was the one who told you _not_ to watch Resident Evil."

"Stop with the I told you so's. Yes, you were right, it gave me nightmares." He curled against her side and rested his head on her shoulder. "Just tell me it can't actually happen."

She stroked his forehead, brushing his hair back. "No, that could never happen. The T virus isn't real and I don't think anything could ever turn dead people into zombies."

He snaked his hand under her shirt and light stroked the skin of her stomach. "And if they ever did, you would kick zombie but just like the Alice in the movie, right?"

"Yes, us Alice's are trained to handle end of the world situations. In fact, any natural disaster you can think of, there's an Alice out there somewhere who knows how to handle it. Since I've already brought down a corrupt monarchy, I think I can handle a few dead guys."

He pulled her into a tight hug. "Lucky me. At least I know I won't be eaten alive by zombies anytime soon."

She rolled on top of him, smiling seductively. "Nope, it's my job to eat you."

_A/n_

_Happy Halloween! _


End file.
